Private-Eye's current front page...

Tesco have been offering Clubcard holders lower prices on selected items in store for some time now. I know when I shop in Tesco I get around 10% discount off the total. There are usually several items in each aisle that have been marked "clubcard price". But I'm not fooled, I know the Clubcard price is probably the true price, and the other on shelf price has been pushed up for that week. But it just looks good on the receipts to show savings.

Now Sainsburys have started Nectar prices. I shop there more than Tesco as they are generally cheaper. So I was looking forward to saving money with Nectar prices. But they have hardly any items in the whole store with a Nectar Prices on the shelf. So far I've only saved on one item on a shopping trip.
I think Nectar should just stick to offering extra points .

Role reversal comedy

https://vm.tiktok.com/ZGJuQfqHP/

This is a lovely, but slightly long, video about cats in a prison. Helping the inmates.
Unfortunately some of the wording in it let’s it down. Who wrote a script where a man with tattoos is called a flower armed man 👨

https://vm.tiktok.com/ZGJuQJR8Q/

Sounds like he is just trying to wind up the fake trans women.
https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-12031831/White-Indiana-politician-sparks-outrage-proclaiming-lesbian-woman-color.html

Labour are scrapping their pledge to stop uni fees, stating the economic situation is different now.
Whats your view on uni fees? Should they be scrapped? More support given to students to pay them? Or are they fair?
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-politics-65454944

JohnKnitsCreations has featured on BBC this morning with his knitting patterns which he sells on Etsy

Have members seen any good, funny or clever items ?

The coronation of King Charles iii sponsored by Crown Paints.

https://www.theguardian.com/global-development/2023/mar/31/what-happens-when-we-send-back-unwanted-clothes?utm_source=pocket-newtab-global-en-GB

On-line shopping's big problem.

The host of Masterchef Australia, who was British, has died of suspected food poisoning. He is survived by his wife Lauren Fried and her four children; Deep, Pan, Crispy, and Shallow.
https://www.theguardian.com/tv-and-radio/2023/may/01/jock-zonfrillo-death-masterchef-australia-judge-chef-dies-aged-46

Seriously though, it is sad that he has passed at such a young age.

https://britmaxnews.com/wikipedia-to-be-banned-in-the-uk-to-push-online-safety-bill-campaign/

Even Hitler, Stalin. Kim Jong Un or Putin never did this.

https://www.msn.com/en-gb/news/uknews/the-exact-words-every-brit-will-be-asked-to-say-out-loud-during-king-charles-coronation/ar-AA1ay2Uh?ocid=msedgntp&cvid=1300035c08cf4cfed8f2ec3e37a7bd48&ei=28

https://vm.tiktok.com/ZGJuUWrSC/

https://uk.yahoo.com/news/diane-abbott-letter-shows-antiracism-070103867.html

Starts euro festival that runs for two weeks

https://news.sky.com/story/eurovision-a-distinctly-ukrainian-feel-in-liverpool-as-eurofestival-gets-under-way-12870937

Whenever I see the self righteous , judgemental and nastiness of some people I wonder why they cannot just stop and think 🤔 and be kind

My wife and I have been following a precious, tiny little girl, of 9 years old, who despite waiting for a bowel transplant still helps others . Dances, laughs and enjoys what life she has

https://vm.tiktok.com/ZGJuBV5v7/

Yes, Bella does look like a three year old 🥲

So sad, man dies

https://www.itv.com/news/border/2023-05-01/father-who-got-stuck-in-indoor-caves-dies-of-his-injuries

Railway workers strike insults Ukraine 🇺🇦

https://news.sky.com/story/amp/eurovision-rail-strike-workers-should-show-solidarity-with-ukraine-colleagues-says-transport-secretary-12870090

We are hosting Eurovision on behalf of the Ukraine this year but Railway staff in Liverpool have named that very day to strike which will cause chaos as people try to get to
the event.

Are the right to do so or would it be kinder and more respectful to call it off and wait a few days ?

https://vm.tiktok.com/ZGJuLhdTK/

Discovered another positive to having a bad memory. I can watch, read all sorts of repeats because I can't remember the ending or outcome

The Tories are hell bent on committing electoral suicide.

https://www.msn.com/en-gb/money/other/free-nhs-prescriptions-for-over-60s-may-still-be-axed-but-nobody-dares-say-it/ar-AA1asuvK?ocid=msedgntp&cvid=b74dcd1a2aaf4330dd63d4f3bd8d5c2a&ei=32

Then they drove off before anyone could catch them.
https://twitter.com/BBCNews/status/1650855653890568193

Am thinking of getting a DNA test to trace my origins,
Ancestry have a 25% off discount at the moment.
Anyone done one of these ?

More than half of London councils own Chinese surveillance cameras and hardware
Key suppliers Hikvision and Dahua.

At least half of London's boroughs have bought and deployed China-made surveillance systems linked to the abuse of Uighurs.

Freedom of information requests filed in late 2020 with all 32 London councils and the next 20 largest UK city councils found about two-thirds owned technology made by two Chinese companies accused of links to the repression of Uighurs.

At least 28 councils owned technology made by Hikvision , the world's largest purveyor of video surveillance systems and vendor to Xinjiang police agencies, revealed data obtained by digital rights researcher Samuel Woodhams and seen exclusively by the Thomson Reuters Foundation.

When the good people of four Surrey villages found themselves plagued by three teenagers joyriding and torching stolen cars, their reaction was untypical, to say the least. Instead of creating a racket about better policing and tougher sentencing, they set up a project whereby the bored youngsters could learn to take apart the cars to which they were so attracted.

GASP (Gomshall, Albury, Shere and Peaslake) Motor Project was conceived in 2005. Today, it’s a fully-fledged alternative learning provider with courses in motor mechanics and practical engineering, running daytime, after-school and evening sessions from mobile units and its workshop in Albury, near Guildford. It works with 32 secondary schools, training hundreds of teenagers disengaged from traditional schooling and in danger of dropping out of formal education.

Practical instruction aside, GASP students also learn the soft skills necessary to help them find work.

“We use mechanics as a tool to teach them communication, teamwork and self-confidence,” explains Chief Executive, Henry Curwen.

And it’s working too. Strong links to a Woking transport business and to engineering companies facilitate work placements, with one student selected by Rolls Royce for a fully sponsored engineering degree at Warwick University. Students regularly take part in electric kit car competitions, as well as learning to repair car, motorbike and quad bike engines and to understand MOT tests.

High staff to student ratios (1:3) mean that GASP is always seeking volunteers to support the trainers, especially for evening sessions, and for visiting engineers to give one-off talks and workshops. If you have a background in engineering or mechanics, and can spare a few hours, email Henry at henry.curwen@gaspmotorproject.org

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-lincolnshire-65411798

There's 71 of them. Why are they there and not in a hospital?

https://www.mirror.co.uk/news/world-news/over-70-nhs-doctors-still-29828634

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/entertainment-arts-65415348

What is your go to source for the days news? Have you got a favourite? If so, what makes it your fav?

"The first sausage arrived in my letter-box in the summer of 2022" Jacob Coetzee told reporters in Surfdale, N.Z.

"Wrapped in white buttered bread, coated in tomato sauce, and looking like it was barbecued. I shrugged it off as a leftover from a drunk passer-by, until it happened again and again.

Same sauce, same sausage, and same location. So I sent a picture to friends, and some of them had been sausaged too.

That's when we realised we had a serial sausager in our community.

It's traumatic. Nobody's letter-box is safe. It's ripping us apart. We can't trust anyone anymore. I've been accused. My brother's been accused. It's a witch-hunt.

Local psycholgist Dr. Dougal Sutherland said "A sense of mystery is a nice distraction. People can talk about it and ask 'Have you been sausaged yet?' "

[ Tx to current Private Eye... ]

Just received an automated message on my landline from 02045257221, purporting to be from a water company (think it was Suffolk - but the very beginning of the message was missing.). It said something about water supply for 2 to 3 hours but that not everyone will be affected and said to press 1 to confirm message received. I duly did.
But when I googled the number it had been reported as a scam, a nuisance and a broadband scam, as well as a water utility service based in London
By pressing 1, what damage have I done, other than verifying the landline is active?

Another little child beaten to death during lockdown

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-12010713/amp/Stepfather-murdered-little-Lola-James-two-jailed-life-court-hearing-streamed-live.html?ico=amp_articleRelated_with_images

https://apple.news/A12eR9zlDSvS9D3atO6s-jA

https://youtu.be/S4xEqGdaHFM

Real life adventure.

Seriously, do they need this many police as protection?

https://twitter.com/politlcsuk/status/1650452381216174081?s=61=v6RWq6UYZzjLNonXUSpS6g

"The US has the highest rate of incarceration in the world.
One in every fifteen people born there today is expected to go to prison.
For black men this figure rises to one in three."

Quote from "Just Mercy" written by Bryan Stevenson.

Would you like to live in the USA today?

The Merton Singfest is an annual celebration of the numerous choirs in the borough. On Saturday May 13th choirs and groups will each sing for 15 minutes throughout the day.
Starting with the nationally acclaimed Wimbledon Choral Society at 10am and finishing with the unacclaimed BigHeart Band care home singers at 5pm.

Take 15 minutes at 10am to see for yourself the power and quality of Wimbledon Choral or just stop by at 5pm for a singalong with the BigHeart Band.

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/usshowbiz/article-12006659/amp/Len-Goodman-dies-aged-78-Strictly-star-passed-away-peacefully-hospice.html

Bless him

Have any of you that have followed the Dominic Raab situation, asked yourself the question, "What if he is right?"
Are we at risk of being governed by a left-wing coterie of senior Civil Servants, because if we are, it won't matter which Party you support it will count for nothing.
We already have a BBC whose "impartiality" department is full of self confessed left-wingers, and it shows, so what next.
If we get to the state when Ministers can't ball-out civil servants for doing a poor job or better still firing them then, I submit that, we are in trouble.

Surprisingly I have just had Chicken Chow mein for the first time, I have always thought I didn't like noodles but my Chinese neighbour brought me some today.
I was surprised it was just a huge amount of noodles and a few strips of chicken, thought there was some veg in it.
Also had a pot of curry sauce with it.

https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2023/feb/04/want-to-truly-have-empathy-for-animals-stop-owning-pets

Dragon catches fire

https://news.sky.com/story/disneyland-fire-breathing-dragon-engulfed-by-flames-during-live-performance-of-fantasmic-12864136