• Ray P @RayPro Norwich - updated 2y

    Pets at Home.

    So I'm at Pets at Home buying a bag of dog food for the whoofies 🐢
    While in the queue, a woman behind me asked if I had a dog πŸ€” Why else would I be buying dog food?
    So being down with the banter I told her "No, I don't have a dog, I'm starting my Dog Food Diet again" and that I probably really shouldn't cos last time, I had ended up in hospital, in intensive care with IV's in both arms and tubes coming out of most orifices. But I had lost 3 stone in 4 Weeks!
    I told her that it was essentially the Perfect Diet and all you have to do is load your pockets with dry dog food and just eat one or two every time you feel hungry. I get the 'Complete' food cos it's nutritionally balanced, so it works really well and I decided that I was goin to give it another go.
    (I have to mention here that practically everyone in the queue was now enthralled with my story)
    Horrified, she asked if I had ended up in intensive care because the dog food poisoned me.
    I told her "No, I stepped off a curb to sniff a Cocker Spaniel's arse and a lorry hit me.
    I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack he was laughing so hard.
    Now that you've read this I have to confess, I nicked it from another page! Now go make someone else laugh πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚

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